Monthly Archive

Stories about heroes— present in every known culture and civilization, transcending continental or oceanic borders—get told in new ways for each generation. These stories connect us to our passion and teach us about our humanity. Their universal language guides us to live in the modern world.

Rooted in ancient stories of heroism and mythology, the Hero’s Journey is the symbolic leap from the known into the unknown. It is a journey where you must find the faith that you will be strong enough and have what you need to face the Dragon regardless of the depth of your self-doubt.

Every human being must undertake this journey at least once in a lifetime, and the reward is worth it. Upon the discovery of the treasure, you return with the knowledge and discovery of your Self. And you deepen the capacity to be successful and transform your kingdom.

As Joseph Campbell puts it, you have followed your bliss.

Summary of Steps

The Ordinary World
For the Hero, this world is most often drab, routine and too small despite the Hero’s limited awareness of this truth. S/He doesn’t understand the personal potential or calling yet. From one day to the next, one moment to the next, the Hero’s life in its mundane-ness is just about to be completely uprooted and spun like Dorothy in a Kansas tornado.

Call to Adventure
“A blunder—apparently the merest chance—reveals an unsuspected world, and the individual is drawn into a relationship with forces that are not rightly understood”. (J. Campbell) The call to adventure is the point in a Hero’s life when s/he is first given notice that everything is going to change, whether they know it or not. The awareness of signs, signals or messages are increasing—yearnings that are inexplicable, feeling that are restless, notions that something is missing in life. The Hero comes to realize that s/he can no longer remain indefinitely in the comfort of the Ordinary World. The shock has to happen

Refusing the Call—Reluctant Hero
Often when the call is given, the Hero refuses to heed it. This may be from a sense of duty or obligation, fear, insecurity, a sense of inadequacy, or any of a range of reasons that work to hold the person in his or her current circumstances. The rules of the Ordinary World that govern the Hero are often in play here—most of the time rooted in some base fear. The Hero has not yet fully committed to the journey and may still be thinking of turning back.

Meeting the Mentor
Once the Hero has committed to the quest, consciously or unconsciously, his or her guide/teacher appears or becomes known. Teachers appear when the Hero is ready to learn what s/he needs in order to face the unknown journey ahead. From them, s/he receives wisdom, guidance and sometimes a swift kick in the pants.

The First Threshold
“The adventure is always and everywhere a passage beyond the veil of the known into the unknown; the powers that watch at the boundary are dangerous; to deal with them is risky; yet for anyone with competence and courage the danger fades.” (J Campbell) This is the point at which the Hero actually commits and crosses into the field of adventure, leaving the known limits of his or her world and venturing into an unknown and dangerous realm where the rules and limits are not known.

Tests, Allies and Enemies
The road of trials is a series of tests, tasks, or ordeals that the person must undergo to begin the transformation. Often the Hero must discern whether the experience is the lesson or the test, always negotiating whether s/he knows enough to overcome the obstacle. Joseph Campbell speaks of this in a psychological context: this is “the process of dissolving, transcending, or transmuting the infantile images of our personal past…Can the ego put itself to death?”

Approach to the Inmost Cave—Supreme Ordeal
This is sometimes described as the person’s lowest point or darkest moment. The shift is in play between the old world and the old Self and new world and future. By entering this stage, the person shows her/his willingness to make a change, to die and become a new person for once this shift becomes, the Hero cannot return to the place where s/he came from. Remember the words of Rilke:

“It’s possible I am pushing through solid rock
in flintlike layers, as the ore lies, alone;
I am such a long way in I see no way through,
and no space: everything is close to my face
And everything close to my face is stone.”

The Ordeal
The Hero’s fortune hits bottom in a direct confrontation with his/her greatest fear, facing the possibility of death and the brink of battle with hostile forces. Metaphorically, the final death of the old Self and life must occur in order to be reborn and reinitiated into new life.

Seizing the Sword (or Prize)
Sometimes the “sword” is knowledge and experience that leads to greater understanding and a reconciliation with hostile forces. S/he is able to overthrow or defeat the opponent and may continue on to confront and defeat old enemies with the new power and knowledge gained from the battle. Often there can be confrontation with parents, old loves or significant figures from the old life.

The Road Back
The Hero makes the decision to return to the Ordinary World. The trick in returning home is to retain the wisdom gained on the quest, to integrate that wisdom into a human life, and figure out how to share the wisdom with the rest of the world. Just as the Hero may need guides and assistants to set out on the quest, often times he or she must have powerful guides and rescuers to bring them back to everyday life, especially if the person has been wounded or weakened by the experience. The Hero has gained the wisdom to know how to ask for help.

Resurrection
This is one last ordeal with death—often a second life-and-death moment. It’s like a final exam for the Hero, who must be tested once more to see if s/her has really learned the lessons of the Ordeal. The old Self dies physically or spiritually and moves beyond the normal human state.

Return with Elixir
Mastery—the return with elixir is the achievement of the goal of the quest. It is what the person went on the journey to get—maybe it’s treasure, but most of the time, it’s love, freedom, wisdom or the knowledge that the Hero can survive the Outside World. All the previous steps serve to prepare and purify the person for this step, i.e., achieving a balance between the material and spiritual worlds. The freedom to live and freedom from the fear of death (or fear of failure) is achieved.

 

By Julnar Rizk

     Funny thing about age, when we were young we never gave it a second thought. Well, when the clock has ticked a few more strokes, why do thoughts change and actions follow? Does growing older mean you have to act old, think old, or sound old? I have known a lot of people through a lot of different situations and let me tell you it doesn’t matter whether they are a plumber of a statesperson when it comes to how they act and think about age. Some of these people would win a contest for acting in the role of a much older person even though their age says different. The real deal here is that all those who characteristically act older than their age are usually letting themselves be controlled by their inner voices. That is to say, they are letting a type of negative self-talk tell them to reduce their spontaneity, their vigour and their zest for life. I’m not saying, though, that you need to act the fool. And, I’m not suggesting that you behave like you are twenty when you are fifty.

      What I am saying is that there is a lot to be positive about; there is a whole host of enjoyment to be had if you allow yourself some freedom to expand your horizons by simply changing your outlook. Now, you might criticize me for saying “simply” because sometimes this is a lot easier said than done. I agree, however, this doesn’t suggest that you can’t change. Why?

     The mind is a very powerful organ. We all have probably heard the expression “mind over matter” and we may have associated this with overcoming some kind of fear, or something similar. You can take this expression and turn it into a daily ritual of choice where the prominent thought is that you have the power to choose how you will think, act and behave for that day. How?

     Here is a simple example. You get up in the morning and start to get ready for work. You look in the mirror and you think you look tired and drawn out. You have now just planted a seed that gives you permission to act tired for the rest of the day. You then trundle down stairs and start to make your morning beverage but accidentally drop your cup and it crashes and breaks. You immediately translate this innocent accident to mean that you’ve started your day off with problems and carry this thought with you to work where you have now set a tone for other things to go wrong. In fact, what you have done is create a scenario that becomes similar to a self-fulfilling prophecy – you’ll have a day filled with issues and problems because you have set your mind to expect it. Age is no different.

    In other words, if you think your old, you are. Start living for the spontaneity around you; live for the quest, the happiness, and the child like enthusiasm as you go through your day. With this positive thought, your mind will more easily form behaviour, and this behaviour will lead to more enjoyment and a greater expression of youthful thinking and behaviour.

By Byron Pulsifer

 

You may think it’s strange to create an article with the headline, “How to Be Unlikeable”".

After all, most of us want to learn how to become more likeable. We can’t imagine that any person would actually want to be unlikeable on purpose. The truth is that there are some people who really are unlikeable. You have probably met a few people who are unlikeable. Maybe you worry that you are unlikeable yourself. Maybe you worry that other people don’t like you.

There are many ways in which people can be unlikeable. Sometimes the reason that people are unlikeable is because they are doing something wrong in the way they interact with others. These people may be too self centered to realize what they are doing wrong. They don’t realize that they have some unlikeable behaviors, so they keep on being unpleasant to others.

Chances are that if these people realized they have some unlikeable behaviors, they might change. After all, by changing some unpleasant behaviors to pleasant ones, these people would become more likeable. Once they became more likeable, they would probably end up having a lot more friends. Most of us want to have more friends. We especially want to have people in our lives who care about us, and who value our friendship in return. When people have unlikeable behaviors, they end up having very few friends. They end up being lonely.

What are some of these unlikeable behaviors that some people have? Here are just a few behaviors that can make a person unlikeable:

• Being gossipy

• Being conceited

• Being self centered

• Never showing interest in other people

• Always complaining

• Being very negative

• Being unreliable

• Being filled with hate towards others

• Being very resentful

• Never talking to other people

Are you guilty of any of these unlikeable behaviors? All of us are probably guilty of some of these bad behaviors once in a while, because let’s face it, none of us is perfect. Still, as long as your negative behavior makes up only a small part of your personality, you may have enough good qualities to overcome it. Your good qualities will help to make you likeable to those you meet.

Over the years, I have come across a few people who actually took pride in the fact that nobody liked them. For some reason, the fact that nobody liked them made these people feel “special”. These people actually seemed to believe that the reason nobody liked them was because they were superior. They had talked themselves into believing that they were alone and disliked because they were better than anybody else. Sadly, the more these people thought they were superior to everyone else, the more they were disliked by everyone who met them.

Is your personal goal to be unlikeable and have no friends? Or would you prefer to be a likeable person and have a lot of friends?

Whatever your goal is, you will find enough information in this article to show you how to achieve your goals. If you want to be unlikeable, just start to adopt some of those bad habits of being self centered that I have listed above. In no time, you will find that people will start to avoid you. If you want to be more likeable, then simply start to do the opposite. Start being pleasant and friendly, and reach out to others. Soon you will develop a reputation as a likeable person.

The choice is up to you

By Royane Real

THREE TEAPOTS

I have a collection of teapots. One was invented by the French artist Jacques Carelman for coffee, not tea, not that I can tell the difference. “Coffeepot for masochists” is what he called it, and it is quite unusable, for the handle is on the same side as the spout. It appears on the cover of “The Design of Everyday Things” (Norman, 1988). Mine is an imitation. Another was designed by Michael Graves — no, not the famous pot with the bird but a lesser-known one called Nanna, a teapot so ugly that it is appealing. Yet another is the tilting pot made by the German firm Ronnefeldt that I discovered while enjoying high tea at the Four Seasons Hotel in Chicago.

The Carelman pot is, by intent, impossible to use. The Nanna teapot looks clumsy, but actually works rather well. The tilting pot is made with deep consideration of the stages of tea brewing: place the tea leaves on the interior shelf and lay the pot on its back while the leaves steep. Then, as the brew approaches the desired strength, tip the pot up to a tilt, partially covering the tea leaves. When the tea is ready, stand the pot upright, so that the leaves are out of the liquid, preventing the tea from becoming bitter. And finally, when the teapot is empty, remove the cover, signaling the waiter that more hot water would be welcome.

My impossible teapot. (Author’s collection, after Carelman’s “Coffeepot for Masochists.”	Michael Grave’s Nannateapot. So homely I couldn’t resist it.

The Ronnefeldt “tilting” teapot. Put leaves on the shelf (seen through the opening on the teapot to the left), fill with hot water, and lay the teapot on its back. As the tea darkens, tilt the pot. Finally, when the tea is done, stand the teapot vertically, so the water no longer bathes the leaves and the brew does not become bitter. Three different teapots, one emphasizing usability (or to be more precise, its absence), one emphasizing aesthetics, and one practicality. But which one do I usually use? All of the above. I do drink tea every morning, but at that early hour, even though I am not willing to compromise on taste, efficiency comes first. So, upon awakening I plod into my kitchen, push the button on my Japanese hot pot that heats the water from its 90° (Celsius) holding temperature while I spoon cut tea leaves into a little metal brewing ball, drop the ball into my cup, and use the now-boiling water to fill the cup. Wait a few minutes, remove the metal ball, and my tea is ready to drink. Fast, efficient, easy to clean. But sometimes, when I have more leisure, or when with guests or family, I use one of the others. The Nanna teapot for its elegance, or the tilting pot for its practicality. Design matters, but which design is preferable depends upon the occasion, the context, and above all, upon my mood. Why do I own several teapots? Because I like them. I proudly exhibit them on the ledge above the kitchen sink. In addition to their function for brewing tea, they are sculptural artwork, giving satisfaction in their appearance. I enjoy standing in front of the window, idly comparing the contrasting shapes, watching the play of light upon the varied surfaces. When I do make tea, I choose the pot that matches my mood, and when I do, the tea tastes superb.  Three teapots: as works of art in the window above the kitchen sink. AFFECT AND DESIGN In the early days of the personal computer, all the display screens were black and white. When color screens were first introduced, I did not understand their popularity. In those days, color was primarily used either to highlight text or to add superfluous screen decoration. From a cognitive point of view, color added no value that could not be provided with the appropriate use of shading. But despite the fact that the interface community could find no scientific benefit, businesses insisted on buying color monitors. Obviously, color was fulfilling some need, but one we could not measure. In order to understand this phenomenon, I borrowed a color display to use with my computer. After the allocated time, I was convinced that my assessment had been correct — color added no discernible value for everyday work. However, I refused to give up the color display. Although my reasoning told me that color was unimportant, my emotional reaction told me otherwise. The “usable but ugly” critique of The Design of Everyday Things has merit insofar as usable designs are not necessarily pleasurable ones. As my story of the three teapots indicates, pleasurable designs are not necessarily usable. But need these attributes be in conflict? Why not beauty and brains, pleasure and usability? When I wrote The Design of Everyday Things, my intention was not to denounce beauty. I simply wanted to position usability in its proper place in the design world: equal to beauty, equal to function: equal, but not superior. I neglected the topic of aesthetics because I thought it already well covered elsewhere. Unfortunately, my neglect was interpreted by many to imply that I was against beauty, for usability at all costs. The field of usability design takes root in the cognitive sciences — a combination of psychology, computer science, human factors, and engineering. These are all analytical fields. The discipline prides itself on its scientific basis and experimental rigor. The hidden danger is to neglect areas that are not easily addressed in the framework of science and engineering. The tensions between aesthetics and usability as well as those between affect and cognition have long bothered me, but it has not been until now that I have been able to make progress in bringing these areas together. Affect and emotion are not as well understood as cognition, but the cognitive and neurosciences have made major strides in the past decade. Note that terminology is still a problem, so in this paper, to avoid the technical debate about distinctions among the concepts of affect, emotion, feelings, mood, motivation, and qualia, I use the reasonably neutral term of “affect.” Affect and cognition can both be considered information processing systems, but with different functions and operating parameters. The affective system is judgmental, assigning positive and negative valence to the environment rapidly and efficiently. The cognitive system interprets and makes sense of the world. Each system impacts the other: some emotions — affective states — are driven by cognition, and cognition is impacted by affect. The surprise is that we now have evidence that pleasing things work better, are easier to learn, and produce a more harmonious result. (Author: Don Norman)